I have a long-seated theory that contrasts how Democrats and Republicans interface with the G/L community. I use the analogy of "wholesale" vs. "retail".
A Democrat supports the G/L Community as a group/class (wholesale) for political and ethical ends, yet has problems with the actual individual (retail) they meet. For many, their G/L support is an abstraction or the casual "...Some of my best friends are...", yet they really don't have G/L friends. They support gay marriage in some far-away state, yet they worry that their son's teacher is a "fag".
Republicans will be supportive of the G/L individuals (retail) that they actually know or meet. They support the individual and won't see them as "other" Yet the react negatively towards the G/L community (wholesale) as an abstraction...Especially ones outside of their community or state. They'll be opposed to gay marriage in their state; and at the same time are unthinkingly polite to the "two guys in the church choir", and think nothing of inviting them over for a picnic without a qualm.
(I never claimed it's a perfect explanation...Just a broad brush.)
